Kitchen Nightmares

In order to shelter myself from the unbearable heat, I have been hibernating inside watching television or reading Pride and Prejudice and Zombies. One of my favorite shows to watch when I just want to become a vegetable brain is Kitchen Nightmares. If you haven't sat down to watch and episode, then I suggest that you do before on demand removes season four from its listings this week.

Basically, the show consists of Gordon Ramsey attempting to help struggling restaurants. The first part of the show is my personal favorite, because Ramsey spends most of it ripping the restaurant and owners apart. The show always starts with the owners trying to explain what the restaurant problems are, which usually consist of "I'm not sure what the problem is" or (my favorite) "we have no customers." 

After this short segment, Ramsey shows up to try the food on the menu and to observe the dining service. He always orders several entrees on the menu, so that he gets a good idea of what he's up against. During this time, the cameras do a very good job of capturing his facial expressions as he puts their inedible garbage in his mouth. After he has enough food in his stomach to clear out his bowels, he heads to the back to meet the kitchen staff, who usually are completely oblivious that their food is shit.

Ramsey then observes a dinner service, which is often a disaster, especially since the restaurant becomes booming with people who hope they are going to get a glimpse of Ramsey. The kitchen staff are completely overwhelmed as they try to cook twice as much shitty food as normal. At a certain point, Ramsey inspects the fridges and overall cleanliness of the restaurant, and on more than one occasion, he shuts the kitchen down. 

After breaking down the problems of the restaurant, the owners either completely are open to change or shut out his suggestions, some even try to blame him for the restaurants problems. Even though these pompous owners are complete assholes to the man, he still pours money into the restaurant, by remodeling and redecorating the restaurant to give it a more modern look and revamping the entire menu.

After four seasons of Kitchen Nightmares, Ramsey has attempted to help 44 different restaurants, mainly in New York and California. The ways in which he changes the restaurant are quite simple, he first tries to give each restaurant a focus, such as a family-style Italian restaurant or a contemporary seafood restaurant. He also simplifies the menu, reducing some of the restaurants menus by 50%. After showing the owners the new changes, the restaurant has a relaunch night, complete with some form of advertising for the opening night. In one episode, Ramsey and the owners hand out fliers to local gyms to promote the restaurant's new healthy menu (The Mixing Bowl).

At the end of the episode, Ramsey gives the owners some advice on how to succeed and the viewer is given a brief update about the restaurant about what happened during the weeks after production. 

Ramsey has visited 44 restaurants during these 4 seasons, with 28 of these restaurants closing their doors permanently after production. Since we are not all math people, I'll break this down into easier numbers to understand: 64% of the restaurants that Ramsey has entered have closed. Holy shit!

A breakdown of the restaurants on Kitchen Nightmares:

Season 1 - 70% of restaurants closed after production

1. Peter's (Babylon, New York) - closed
2. Dillon's (New York, New York) - closed (was remaned Purnima during production)
3. The Mixing Bowl (Bellmore, New York) - closed
4. Seascape (Islip, New York) - new ownership
5. The Olde Stone Mille (Tuckahoe, New York) - still open
6. Sebastian's (Toluca Lake, California) - closed
7. Finn McCool's (Westhampton, New York) - new ownership
8. Lela's (Pomona, California) - closed
9. Campania (Fair Lawn, New Jersey) - closed
10. The Secret Garden (Moonpark, California) - sold, closed

Season 2 - 100% of restaurants closed

1. Handlebar (Mount Sinai, New York) - closed
2. Giuseppe's (Macomb Township, Michigan) - closed
3. Trobiano's (Great Neck, New York) - closed
4. Black Pearl (New York, New York) - closed
5. J. Willy's (South Bend, Indiana) - closed
6. Hannah & Mason's (Cranbury, New Jersey) - closed
7. Jack's waterfront (St. Clair Shores, Michigan) - closed
8. Sabadell's (Stamford, Connecticut) - closed
9. Fiesta Sunrise (West Nyack, New York) - closed
10. Sante' La Brea (Los Angeles, California) - closed
11. Cafe' 36 (La Grange, Illinois) - closed

Season 3 - 64% of restaurants closed after production

1. Hot Potato Cafe (Philadelphia, Pennsylvania) - closed
2. Flamangos (Whitehouse Station, New Jersey) - closed (renamed The Junction during production)
3. Bazzini (Ridgewood, New Jersey) - closed
4. Mojito (Brooklyn, New York) - still open
5. Lido di Manhattan Beach (Manhattan Beach, California) - still open
6. Le Bistro (Lighthouse Point, Florida) - still open
7. Casa Roma (Lancaster, California) - still open
8. Mama Rita's (Newbury Park, California) - closed
9. Anna Vincenzo's (Boca Raton, Florida) - closed
10. Fleming (Miami, Florida) - closed
11. Sushi-Ko (Thousand Oaks, California) - closed

Season 4 - 17% of restaurants closed after production

1. Spanish Pavillion (Harrison, New Jersey) - still open
2. Classic American (West Babylon, New York) - still open
3. PJ's Steakhouse (Queen's, New York) - closed (renamed PJ's Grill during production)
4. Grasshopper Also (Cardstadt, New Jersey) - still open
5. Davide (Boston Massachusetts) - still open
6. Down city (Providence, Rhode Island) - still open
7. Tavolini (Bridgeport, Connecticut) - closed
8. Kingston Cafe (Pasadena, California) - still open
9. La Frite (Sherman Oaks, California) - still open
10. Capri (Eagle Rock, California) - still open
11. Zeke's (Metairie, Louisiana) - still open
12. Oceana (New Orleans, Louisiana) - still open