Status: Dude, I heard they're opening a new, evil version of Wal-mart called Volde-mart.
Comment: They have darkmark-downs everyday on hundreds of your favorite items!
Status: I wonder if Jesus got boners?
Comment: I dunno, but I know he got nailed.
Status: I was wondering, do deaf people masturbate using only one hand so they can moan with the other????
Status: If Abortion is murder, doesn't that make masturbation genocide? Do BJ's turn into cannibalism?
Status: Vincent Van Gogh. Everyone said to him, "You can't be a great painter, you only have one ear." And you know what he said? "I can't hear you."
Comment: Lance Armstrong. Everyone said to him, "You can't be a great bicyclist, you only have one testical." And you know what he said? "Suck my ball."
Comment: Ray Charles. Everyone said to him, "You can't be a great piano player, you're blind." And you know what he said? "I don't see your point."
Comment: Helen Keller. Everyone said to her, "You can't be a great writer, you're deaf, dumb, and blind. "Ad you know what she said? nothing.
Status: 2 pistons tickets for tomorrow section 102 row j...can't go anymore its my dads birthday message if u want them
Comment: Why would u get ticks knowing its your pops bday?? Asshole.
Comment: cuz i was gonna take him but hes in the hospital asshole
Status: hey mitch, thanks for dumping me on my birthday asshole.
Comment: he dumped me on christmas. what a fag...
Comment: Thanksgiving for me.
White -> Red: After plunging the toilet i thought the blockage had cleared. I then flushed the toilet again. There is now poo water and more pieces of poo on the bathroom floor
Comment: classic
Red: People I bump into on the street are offering condolences about our 'poo problem.' Thanks for putting this on fb. Thanks.
White->Red: wel i guess we wan2 get there n set up before it gets hot. So mayb 9-9:30/ N coz we wan2 c where we wan2 stay. N i guess we wil go to Invy first coz i think its the first place out of that, venus n warratah. O n bring ur lunches n snacks so we can hav it on the beach
Red->White: please stop typing like a retarded squirrel
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